Life’s a beach

Today I went to the beach. Alone. I needed some rest, and I am not very good at resting. Sitting around the house, a quiet weekday morning usually turns into sorting out the kid’s clothes, tidying the storeroom, weeding the garden, or writing behind the computer. And that was not what the doctor prescribed.

A few weeks ago, when I watched my predecessor teach the ‘Dreams Class’ I am now teaching, I drifted away during the visualisation session. The idea was that you could see yourself in your own dreamed-for future. I closed my eyes, and took off. Dreaming, I saw myself on a beach, on a sun lounger. In the distance I could faintly hear children’s voices. Nothing but golden sand obstructed my view of a turquois sea. The sun shone brilliantly and a breeze refreshed me, as did a colourful cocktail in my hand.

So was this my dream for my future? Not me being a famous author, a successful product developer, or a great mother? Me being lazy on a beach. Seriously? I dismissed the thought as crazy. I like to keep busy, to be slightly overworked rather than anything else, that is just the way I like it. Isn’t it? 

Isn’t it? Slowly, the idea started ripening in my brain. Maybe it was time to start listening to my subconscious me. I am actually quite stressed most of the time. Way too busy. And with my state of health, I really do need some rest. 

Getting ready for the beach was great already. No plastic buckets and spades, no goggles, no inflatable toys, no piles of swimsuits and towels, no emergency snacks, no rash shirts. Just my bikini and a book. I was done in a jiffy.

I finished the whole book. I ate a salad. I drank some tea. I looked at the not too turquois sea full of big container ships, and stared at the refinery in the distance, realising I had come a long way from studying its chemical streams in university. I paddled a bit in the lukewarm water. In short, I had an amazing time.

And even though the sky was a Singapore rainy season grey, and nothing like the clear blue of my dream, I am now red. With my optimistic light packing I had forgotten the sunscreen. I am red, but thoroughly rested. Going to the beach alone, on a weekday, with nothing more than a book and a bikini feels just like skipping school. It feels exciting. Fun. And a little bit wrong. Now my new dream is to go again. Next time, I will bring some sunscreen. And, maybe, my husband. I think he needs this dream too.